


Starry skies

by scribblingfairytale



Series: Starry skies [1]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Levi´s POV, Love, Reader-Insert, Stars, thoughts of reincarnation, ways of grief
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-03
Updated: 2014-05-03
Packaged: 2018-01-21 19:06:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,649
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1560854
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/scribblingfairytale/pseuds/scribblingfairytale
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Levi watches together with you the starry sky and asks himself how the hell he ended up here alone with you...</p>
<p><i> "Can I ask you a question?"</i> is everything you say before you´re waiting for his answer while your gaze rests on the stars above.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Starry skies

_“Corporal, can I ask you something?“_  
  
I looked to the girl sitting beside me on the edge of the rooftop.  
Still I was wondering why I ended up here. With her.  
  
Today was one of those days we, as soldiers, dislike the most. We came back from an expedition outside the walls earlier this day. Again the people were murmuring while we were going through the streets.  
So many losses. So many dead. So many to be mourned.  
And again, there was no time for it. No time to bury them. But the lack of time wasn´t the only reason. To many bodies were unrecognizable or there were only pieces of the persons left.  
Erwin decided not to let the families come here. It wouldn´t ease their pain.  
We burnt our comrades in a big fire.  
  
Every soldier had a different way to show his mourning. Most of the soldiers, especially those who experienced the loss for the first time, were standing by the fire until there was nothing left of it. Only ashes.  
Others would stand there only for a while and leave then. Some would be alone in their rooms thinking of the people they hold dear. And were gone now.  
  
I was one of those who would stand by the fire for a little while. It´s not that I saw it as a farewell, but I thought we have to at least acknowledge this event. Somehow it was a funeral.  
But me being the Lance Corporal meant a lot of paperwork. That´s mainly the reason why many of us higher ups were leaving the fire so early. Although Erwin still was there when I left.  
  
And then there was that girl. [Name] was her name when I remember correctly. She never showed up at the fire. Not once have I seen her there.  
But it was not that she was the type of person mourning alone in a room. I wasn´t sure, but it always seemed that she wasn´t mourning at all. Only a sad smile showed that she still seemed to have a heart.  
And, well, then there was that other thing. She would always go to the dead bodies of our comrades before they were burnt and lay down a daffodil on them. Even on the pieces of someone’s body. No matter how many.  
  
I had no idea where she got the flowers from. But I understood that it meant a lot to her. It was a symbolic act. For what? I still wasn´t sure about it.  
Daffodils had many meanings. Regard. New beginning. Rebirth. Eternal life.  
But somehow I had the feeling it was not quite what she really meant by these.  
  
As I left the fire I found myself wondering about those daffodils once more. I almost reached the door of the HQ as I saw something from the corner of my eye. It was a flickering shine high up on one of the rooftops. The moon was only a thin line but it spent enough light that I could see a person sitting there.  
  
 _Tch._  
  
This was a part of the roofs which was only reachable by the 3D gear. It made me only angrier. That brat would need a very good excuse to get out of this without extra chores. Gladly I still had my gear on. So I flew up there to see who was there.  
  
Surprisingly it was _her_ of all people. She didn´t had her gear on. A candle was carefully placed next to her. Her gaze was directed up to the starry sky.  
My anger vanished as soon as it appeared.  
Slowly I approached her.  
  
“What are you doing here, brat?” I asked as I had reached her. It sounded gentler as I wanted it to be.  
  
A little smile spread across her face. And disappeared.  
  
“I´m watching the stars.”  
  
 _Obviously._  
  
Still I had no idea why I had decided to sit right next to her. And watch the stars as well.  
  
  
 _“Corporal?”_  
  
I snapped back to reality. Right she had asked me something.  
  
“Call me Levi” I said without thinking.  
  
Soon after I regretted it. What the hell was wrong with me? I cursed under my breath.  
  
“You’re a superior, Corporal. So I won´t do that. Anyways, can I ask you a question then?”  
  
“Spit it out already.”  
  
A little chuckle escaped her lips. It left me a bit light headed. The sound of it was … calming. Reassuring. I looked at her in awe.  
  
“Do you **believe** , Corporal?”  
  
Belief? Did I believe?  
  
“What is that question supposed to mean?”  
  
Her gaze met mine. The smile was there again.  
  
“You´re staying at the fires quite long. Longer than some other higher ups. Guess it means something to you?”  
  
“Not really.”  
  
Confusion built up in her.  
  
“But you must believe in something! And I don´t mean believing in the decisions one makes.”  
  
I almost rolled my eyes. Of course I knew what she meant. But how telling her?  
  
“What do you think of death?”  
  
“Inevitable” I said almost immediately.  
  
“Don´t you ever wonder how it might feel like, being dead? Or what would be after that?”  
  
“There is no time speculating about that.”  
  
“But death is all around us.”  
  
“Yes, that´s why it is inevitable.”  
  
She sighed exasperated. Her gaze flickered up to the sky once more. She seemed a bit sad, the smile slowly faltered. A feeling of knowledge crept into my heart.  
  
“Why don´t you meet the fire? Seems that you are thinking differently about death.”  
  
“I can´t really identify myself with funerals, or that fire even. And graves. It´s not easy to explain, but I don´t think that this is supposed to be the person I hang out with. Like ‘Hey Corporal, how are you? How is it down there in your grave?’ I can´t identify with this.”  
  
“ ’Cause I´m not dead, stupid.”  
  
“You know what I mean.”  
  
 _Yes. More than you think._  
  
“So what do you think then if you can´t identify with it?”  
  
Her smile grew stronger once more.  
  
“Isn´t that obvious?”  
  
I raised an eyebrow in confusion. Her gaze still rested on the stars above. Their shine caressed her skin from above.  
Finally she continued.  
  
“I think the souls of every person who died would end up as a star in the starry sky. From there they are looking down to us. Watching us. Always. Forever. And ever.”  
  
“Not  always.”  
  
She met my gaze.  
  
“When do they not watch us?”  
  
“On daylight.”  
  
“Not seeing them doesn´t mean that they aren´t there. Clouds could cover them. But they are not gone. And on daylight… The sun´s light is so bright that it over shines the stars. Still they are there. Always watching us.”  
  
I growled.  
  
“So you actually think that stars are the people we lost?”  
  
“The souls of them, yes. But from every human.”  
  
“So you would say to them ‘Hey, how are you?’ because you can identify with it?”  
  
Damn I sounded more sarcastic as I used to be. Again that chuckle of hers.  
  
“I guess…”  
  
Another silence enveloped us. And then I realized.  
  
“That´s why the **journey**?”  
  
“Yes, the daffodils should represent the journey they will make.”  
  
Suddenly she looked at me. “So that you know what I´m believing in, you still didn´t change your mind, Corporal?”  
  
“Levi” I demanded.  
  
“You are like a cat. Levi…”  
  
God my name out of her mouth sounded… great? I couldn´t quite place it. But the first time in years I felt content.  
  
“A _what_?”  
  
“A cat” She giggled.  
  
“So you´re also believing in reincarnation?”  
  
“Nope. But still. If something like another lifetime exists, you would have been a cat. Always your claws out and acting defensively.”  
  
“And you would have been…?”  
  
“The dog perhaps, who always annoys the cat.”  
  
“Is there another reason why you think I would have been a cat?” I asked quietly. Gently even.  
  
“You never know what a cat is thinking. And it would never stay with you if you forced it to. It is not a constant, even if it likes you it would only drop by once in a while. Like with me now. And if you captured its heart and received its full trust, it will stay with you. Forever.”  
  
Another chuckle escaped her. “Well only the purring is missing when you are feeling good.”  
  
“Very funny” I snapped back.  
  
“Actually it is.”  
  
“No.”  
  
“Yes.”  
  
“Stop it already!” I exclaimed.  
We looked up to the sky. Suddenly I realized how close she was. Her shoulder almost touched mine. I could feel her warmth radiate to me.  
Following an impulse I grabbed her arm and forced her to look at me in the eyes.  
Her (e/c) orbs locked with mine. She was close. Very close. I could feel her breath against my skin.  
  
“I don´t think about death or believe in a life after it, because the only thing that matters are the people **living**. Me being alive. And the persons I held dear. They are the stars enlightening the path you are walking on. But there would always be a person who would shine brighter than anyone else. I believe that finding that person would be the best you can achieve in life. Once you found it, _her_ , you should hold on her. Forever.”  
  
I moved in even closer. Our noses touched slightly.  
  
“I believe I finally found that star.”  
  
With that I closed the distance between the two of us and kissed her. I kissed my first and only love. And I promised myself that I would hold on her as tight as possible so she wouldn´t slip away from me. I wanted to watch the starry skies with her forever.

**Author's Note:**

> This story can be seen as a standalone, though I do have written a sequel to it.  
> The sequel called "For blue skies".


End file.
